NHL ombudsman recommends Western-style duel to solve Leafs' goaltender issues

The Elbow staff

Artist's interpretation of Reimer in the duel. Altered images courtesy of: Bridget Samuels & Rama

TORONTO, ON – The NHL's ombudsman has recommended that Jonathan Bernier and James Reimer engage in a Western-style duel to clear the logjam in net and end the annoying discussions each year about who the "real" number one is.

In Monday's press release, he said enough was enough. 

"This will be the third straight season that we've had discussions about which goaltender should be the starter for the Leafs," he said. 

"It's gotten completely out of hand, even for Toronto's hockey-mad market. I summon these two men to engage in a duel at Yonge & Dundas at high noon on Wednesday, the seventh day of October."

"This will give us all a chance to finally embrace one of these goaltenders as the starter and put the issue to bed. Quite literally."

Local reporters have now turned their focus to Tyler Bozak and his legitimacy as a number one centre in the NHL.