SAN JOSE, CA – Sharks teammates Brent Burns and Joe Thornton today announced that they will be combining their powers in the summer, by shaving off their beards to make a nice Persian-style rug.
While the design is still yet to be confirmed by the pair, it is believed that they have enough hair for a 6-foot by 3-foot floor covering.
Read MoreTORONTO, ON – Game two of the World Cup of Hockey final has been forfeited by Canada after the puck got lost in Joe Thornton's beard during the second period.
The incident happened in Canada's offensive zone as Thornton and linemate Matt Duchene were fighting for the puck against Roman Josi and Zdeno Chara.
Read MoreNHL is our game, delicious pasta is our name.
The best satirical hockey website in the world. Maybe the only one.
We specialize in writing news specific to the NHL and touch on hockey from around the world, but with a twist. Rather than hockey news you'll see in any other medium, it is all satirical. And we think we're the only ones doing it.
All of the content featured on this website is satirical, and all quotes fictional. It is meant to give desperately sad hockey fans something to be happy about during what can be a cold and depressingly long season. If you have any queries or concerns, please feel free to contact us at newselbow@gmail.com.
