The Elbow staff
CHICAGO, IL – The Blackhawks today announced that they will be wearing their regular home jerseys for all future Winter Classics, as they can no longer be bothered designing new ones for every single outdoor game they play each year.
General manager Stan Bowman said that he and his staff were sick and tired of trying to come up with dumb reasons for why each jersey means something to the team's history.
"There aren't any eras in our history left over for which we can pay tribute to anymore," he told reporters on Tuesday afternoon. "Not all teams have an era worth celebrating every Saturday night like the Montreal Canadiens."
"Our designers have made it clear that the well has run dry."
Bowman added that he was hopeful the league would let other teams participate in Chicago's place one of these years.
"Make no mistake, it was a lot of fun playing these outdoor games the first five times."
NHL commissioner Gary Bettman responded by saying it was probably time to give fans what they wanted, and get Pittsburgh involved in the next few outdoor spectacles.