The Elbow staff
DALLAS, TX – Just one day ahead of their first preseason game, the Stars have announced that the 9,000 seats making up the lower bowl section at American Airlines Center have been completely removed to make way for a "fan pit".
The muddied area boasts a loose capacity of 26,000, bringing the arena's maximum attendance to a league-leading 35,000.
"The seats down there were barely getting used, so we tried thinking of the best way to take advantage of the space," team spokesman Joel Altidore said.
"By opening up the arena's lower bowl, we're able to cram in fans who are willing to fight each other for a view of the action at a fraction of the price."
A single ticket to the fan pit will cost $10, but no bathroom privileges will be given.
The team hopes that the action on the ground level will give fans in other parts of the arena an added spectacle to keep themselves interested during the games.
Fans with tickets in the upper tiers will be given one piece of rotten produce upon entry, and will be encouraged to fling it at the people below during the intermissions.
The team says it is now accepting applications for its "Dirt Crew".